Venus Envy (1993)

Title (as given to the record by the creator):  Venus Envy
Date(s) of creation:  1993
Creator / author / publisher:  M@ce
Location: Terre Haute, IN, US
Physical description:
24-page half-size zine
Reference #: VenusEnvy-1993
Source: 
QZAP
Links:  [ PDF ] [ QZAP ]


Content Warning: depictions of extreme thinness, weight numbers, cutting/self-harm, descriptions of participating in eating disorder behaviors.


Transcript:

Page 1: VENUS ENVY 

[struck out: P.O. BOX 3642 TERRE HAUTE, IN 47803] 

P.O. BOX 8948 MPLS, MN 55408

2 STAMPS OR TRADE

EMMA COPY!!!

1-13 Venus of Willendorf, c. 25,000-20,000 B.C. Stone, actual size. Naturhisorisches Museum, Vienna. (Cast of original.)

[cartoon images of seven nude people around the edge of the cover page. Photography of Venus of Willendorf statue is large on the page.]

Preceding pages describe a comic, the art style is cartoon-ish with simple lines in black and white.

Page 2: [top panel depicts someone sleeping in bed, an alarm clock reads “6:00” and is depicted as going off with “BEEP BEEP BEEP BEE”]

FUCK…ITS 6:00 ON MONDAY AGAIN…TIME TO GO TO THAT USELESS JOB…

[bottom panel depicts the person’s silhouette standing in the light of their bedroom door]

Page 3: [whole page illustration depicting a nude person turning on a light]

ANOTHER MORNING THE COLD FLOORED BATHROOM….THE FIRST EYE STINGING LIGHT IN THE MORN…THE FIRST GLANCE AT THE SLEEP RIDDEN BODY IN THE MIRROR…UNFORTUNATELY FOR ME THE LATTER MEANS —

Page 4: [whole page illustration depicts same nude person cover themself with their hands and looking down, surrounded by text in various stylizations] FAT, FAT, UNACCEPTABLE, UNLOVABLE, SUFFER, UGLY FAT LONELY FAT FAT FAT LONELY UGLY UGLY STUPID, FAT UGLY DUCK, PAIN, FAT FAT, STARVE, ABUSE, UGLY, CRY, TWO TON TESSIE, WHY ME?, FAT, NO WILLPOWER, SELF-DESTRUCT, LARDASS, UGLY, DISGUSTING, FAT LAZY SLOB, USELESS NO GOOD, EMBARAS, SHAME, FATTY FATTY FATTY, FAT FAT, NO BEAUTY, NO SEXUALITY, BAD, FAT UGLY WHO WOULD BE, DEPRESSION, YOU’RE NO WOMAN, SELF-HATRED, ATTRACTED TO YOU?, WHO’D WANT YOU? MUST BE A LESBIAN MUST BE STRAIGHT MUST BE

Page 5: [top panel depicts someone sitting on the toilet nude with their face in their hands]

SO HERE I AM…ANOTHER MORNING BY MY MIRROR CRYING AND SUFFERING IN EMOTIONAL TORMENT….

[bottom panel depicts person kneeling in the corner with their arms hugging themself and crying]

FROM CHILDHOOD ON, I’VE BEEN TAUGHT TO HATE EVERY NOOK AND CRANNY OF MY BODY, THUS CAUSING INTENSE DISLIKE, DISTRUST AND LOATHING OF WHO I AM….AS A PERSON…

Page 6: [full page illustration depicts small shadow figures throwing rocks at the main character who is crying and bundled up in winter clothing with a hat and scarf]

SO HERE’S THE SCENARIO (AND WHICH SIDE HAVE YOU BEEN ON?)….

HEH! LARDASS!!!

GO ON A DIET, BITCH!!

C’MERE FATTY! TAKE THIS!

EVERY DAY FROM KINDERGARTEN THRU THE END OF HIGH SCHOOL….

Page 7: [top panel depicts four people holding hands in a circle, with a fifth person standing off to the side]

RARELY CHOSEN FOR FUN THINGS KIDS ALWAYS DID….

ALWAYS LEFT OUT…

[bottom panel depicts a magazine cover with a person’s made-up face. The magazine is “ELITE #42” and the headlines in the bottom right corner list “HOW TO LOSE WEIGHT FAST….HOW TO LOSE WEIGHT EVEN FASTER….”]

MASS MEDIA CONSTANTLY CHANGED….MAKING THE SOCIAL “IDEAL” MORE AND MORE IMPOSSIBLE TO REACH…(THO’ WE WERE TAUGHT TO TRY OUR BEST TO GET THERE…)

Page 8: 

FOR THE MOST PART, THE FEW RELATIONSHIPS I HAD IN MY YOUNGER DAYS USUALLY WENT SOUR…TAKE PRICK FOR EXAMPLE [arrow points to an image of a person with their arm around the main character and note that says HAPPY DAY FOR ME!]

WE HAD LOTS OF FUN TILL HE SEEMED TO DISAPPEAR [arrow points to an image of the main character shrugging their shoulders]

COME TO FIND OUT PRICK WAS WAY TOO EMBARRASSED TO BE SEEN WITH ME IN FRONT OF HIS FRIENDS (A GOSSIP IN HIS GROUP HAD TO “BREAK IT TO ME…..) [image depicts main character crying and hugging themself low across their hips with a note that say ALONE AGAIN while a feminine appearing person whispers in their ear and points at another person with their back turned to the two people saying AMPF]

Page 9: 

I’VE EVEN MET A FEW COOL PEOPLE WITH TRUE, KIND HEARTS AND MINDS WHO LOVE ME FOR ME (AND EVEN CONSIDER ME “SEXY”…)

[image depicts nude person with a mohawk, glasses, and penis, and sweating. They are facing the main character, who is also nude, and gripping their upper arms]

THO’ THE LOVE IS SO GENUINE, SO STRONG…THE FUCKING TRAINING I HAD FOR SELF-HATRED EVEN MAKES ME NOT BELIEVE THOSE LOVING SOULS!!!! (and it makes them hurt, too!)

Page 10: 

SURE! I’VE TRIED ALL THE OBVIOUS “CURES”….

[image 1 depicts main character kneeling in front of the toilet with their fingers in their mouth, image 2 depicts a fridge with a lock and chain with the main character leaned against it looking exhausted, arrow points to their stomach and reads “GROWL”]

PUSHING MY BODY AND MIND AS IT HAD BEEN BY OTHERS….FIGHTING THE PAIN IN A NEVERENDING BATTLE….

[image 3 depicts a lit candle, a written note and pen, and a wrist with blood dripping and pooling beneath the arm]

DO YOU REALIZE HOW MANY OF US HAVE LOST THE BATTLE?!

Page 11:

Some facts from the “The Beauty Myth” by Naomi Wolf

  • 90 to 95 perfect of anorexics and bulimics are wimmin
  • America leads the world in female anorexia
  • Some facts quoted from the American Anorexia and Bulimia Association:
    • Anorexia and Bulimia strike a million American wimmin every year
    • 150,000 American wimmin die every year from anorexia
    • Every twelve months there are 17,024 more deaths from anorexia in the U.S. alone than the total number of deaths from AIDS tabulated by the World Health Organizations in 177 countries and territories from the beginning of the epidemic to 1988
  • Joan Jacobson Brumberg in Fasting Grils: The Emergence of Anorexia Nervosa as a Modern Disease puts the number of all anorexics at 5 to 10 perfect of all American wimmin, i.e., one out of every 5 college students (wimmin) is anorexic…….

[image depicts a naked person laying on their side, propped up on one elbow with long dark hair and visible ribs]

Page 12:

SO HOW ARE WE SO FUCKING DIFFERENT?!

THINK FOR ONE UNUSUAL MOMENT ABOUT OUR BODIES AND THEIR SIMILARITIES…

[image depicts the outlines of two bodies with the brain, heart, tummy, and genitals drawn in. the body on the left is thin, the body on the right is larger. Text pointing to the body on the left reads “YOU, (‘ELLE’, ‘VOGUE’, ‘MTV’, T.V. COMMERCIALS….). Text pointing to the body on the right reads “ME (OR US. AVERAGE HUMAN ANIMALS)”.]

BRAINS – THINKS (- FOR THE MOST PART!), FORMULATES, PROCESSES INFO

HEARTS – FEELS PAIN, JOY, SADNESS, ANGER….

TUMMY – GROWLS, HUNGERS, GETS UPSET (CAN STARVE)

GENITALS – CAN BE AROUSED AND BE SEXUALLY ACTIVE

Etc. etc. etc.

SO WHEN WE HAVE THE SAME CONTENTS, WHY DOES THE PACKAGING MAKE US DIFFERENT? IT FUCKING DOESN’T!!!!

Page 13:

LOOK AROUND…..

[image depicts eight nude people of varying heights, body sizes, genital configurations, and physical abilities]

WE ARE ALL VERY, VERY DIFFERENT….DIFFERENT SHAPES, SIZES, COLORS, STRUCTURES….BUT OUR HEARTS, DREAMS, DESIRES….ITS ALL BASICALLY THE SAME….

Page 14:

I STRUGGLE EVERY DAY WITH MY MIRROR TO REAFFIRM THAT I AM WHO I AM…

[image depicts person looking into a bathroom mirror]

AND THOSE WHO CANT ACCEPT ME FOR WHO I AM MUST LEAD A PRETTY SAD, SHALLOW LIFE……

[image depicts a hand reaching for an open lipstick on a flat surface]

MAYBE THIS LIPSTICK’LL BE GOOD FOR SOMETHING AFTER ALL

Page 15:

WANTED: HEARTS AND MINDS OPEN AND FREE FOR LOVE, ANARCHY, PEACE and UNDERSTANDING

XO

M@CE

THE END

[assorted images around the text depicting a hold with two toothbrushes and toothpaste, lipstick, and a person]

Page 16: [page of news clippings pasted together with some notes scribbled in. text below will be for the news clippings unless otherwise noted]

NEWSWEEK: SEPTEMBER 3,1990

Oh, Come On Fatties!

GAIN RESPECT

THOUSANDS HAVE LOST WEIGHT AND YOU CAN TOO!

BY KEN HECHT

A recent issue of The New England Journal of Medicine reported that genetic makeup is highly influential in determining how the body handles unneeded calories and distributes body fat. In other words, some people are destined to be fatties. This is information that should be withheld from the fat multitude because the obses will latch onto any excuse for failing to lose weight. And destiny is a dandy excuse. I speak from personal experience.

TRADE YOUR OLD BODY FOR A NEW ONE

I know my tone may seem cold, harsh and lacking in understanding. But reality often comes in a cold, harsh package. And I understand the devastation to the quality of one’s life caused by those feelings of hopelessness and self-loathing. What I also understand is that excuses and the never-ending search for magic bullets keep the overweight stuck where they are: miserable and low on self-esteem.

Hect is a TV producer-writer in Los Angeles.

[hand written note] LIKE THIS GUY WOULD HAVE A REAL GOOD FUCKING GRASP ON REALITY ANYWAY!

LOSE UP TO 50 POUNDS!

[image of a person’s face with a circle and slash over top]

Let’s face it, the obese will latch onto almost any excuse to justify being fat
Lose All The Weight You Can!
Now Together with Your Diet You’ll
Hide Pounds Fast! Lose Bulges, Bumps & Inches

ANTI-FAT WONDER WEAPON

miracle product
Diet Plan
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HELP SAVE THE PLANET…JOIN NOW!
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No Fat Pie T-Shirt
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$12.50 S.M.L.XL.
1-800-233-4221 Visa/MC/Discover
Or Send Check or Money Order to
Sports & Shirts [unreadable address]

Page 17:

BEAUTIFUL by Cindy Headley

Beautiful body, he said.
She smiled briefly, turned, ordered a drink
Mmm…whiskey, our favorite.
She’s dead now.
Cardiac arrest due to bulimia.
And someone thought she had a beautiful body
5’5” -93 lbs. – a beautiful body?!?
Some call it suicide
But I think it’s murder
Murder by images
IMages that say skinny is beautiful
Your body and looks are who you are
Images that are everywhere
Billboards, commercials, TV shows
Everywhere…
Can women escape them?
She did.
she died.

Reprinted without permission from:

TOO FAR FANZINE
po box 40185
Berkeley, CA 94704-4185
($1 for printing and postage costs)

[image depicting person holding something above their head, they are extremely thin with ribs and other bones able to be seen through the skin]

Page 18:

FAT HATE

skinny people torture you
by telling you that they need to go on a diet
if they’re too fat
what’s that make you
you must be really disgusting
in their eyes
skinny people who make a point
to tell you they’re on a diet
are hatemongers
TV bombards you
with images of happy skinny people
drinking diet shakes
beautiful happy skinny people
and if you want to be beautiful
you have to be one of them
TV IS TERRORISM
thin is beautiful
fat is ugly
thin is beautiful
fat is ugly
thin is beautiful
fat is ugly
you’re told over and over and over again
until you believe it
your friends hate you
they say you have such a pretty face
they mean the rest of you is ugly
you walk into a room
and overhear
“isn’t ‘pretty fat’ an oxymoron?
how can you be pretty and fat at the same time”
then your friend is silent
when she notices you’re in the room
YOUR FRIENDS ARE HATEMONGERS

Page 19: (continuation of writing from page 18)

doctors tell you for $1,000
they can make you thin
they claim you’ll be healthy
and as an added bonus
you’ll be beautiful
they just want to cut you open
or starve you
and watch you gain it all back
so you’ll give them another $1,000
i’ve seen it happen before
DOCTORS ARE HATEMONGERS
when you were a child
your parents put you on a forced diet
even your own fucking parents
can’t love you for who you are
but oh
you have such a pretty face
and 
we just don’t want to you to get teased at school
(you fat ugly pig)
YOUR PARENTS ARE HATEMONGERS
who gives a fuck
who in the world gives a fuck
what fat people feel
what fat people think
if you object to the massive barrage
of hateful talk on TV by the
aesthetic supremacists
you’re just being too sensitive
SHUT UP FATSO
you don’t count
you don’t matter
shut up fatso
jeff Sub-humyn
c/o HARMFUL MATTER zine
po box 3642
terre haute, IN 47803
(2 stamps, trade, 50 cents or whatever)

Page 20:

From the smelly punk bastard

writer of VOMIT BLOOD:

The fucking patriarchal system is turning the wimmins liberation movement against its self by the use and abuse of the female anatomy. notice that as the striving for equality is painfully being fought. There has been a widespread glut of beauty, fashion, and weight loss programs. In the war against wimmin (and make no mistake, it is a war as real as any other) our fascist government and their state controlled media promote the ideas of fashion consciousness and an unattainable degree of physical beauty. The reason why this is being done is quite simple: at 52% of the population, wimmin post a potential threat to a male dominated society, so of course it is in the bastards self-interest to continue to keep wimmin feeling like shit and powerless. By targeting the physical aspects of wimmin, the system guarantees that men will dominate wimmin, because wimmin will feel so inferior about their own bodies that this insecurity will creep into other areas, and if this is not always true, then the issue of physical attractiveness is turned to nullify any issue of relevance. The persyn wanting equality and justice is dismissed as “the fat, ugly feminist”, for example. And this suits our Patriarchy just fine. The pigs have laws passed and court rulings designed specifically to disempower wimmin based solely upon physical reasons. In the course case Barnes vs. Costle, the fascist judge ruled that if a womyns physical characteristics were the reasons given for sexual harrassment, then the way she looked became the problem, NOT the harassment, and theref no protection under the Civil Rights act. In Tamini vs. Howard Johnson Co. (BASTARDS!), Ms. Tamini was “legally” fired for not wearing makeup. With Vinson vs. Meritor Savings Bank, Ms. Vinson was raped by her boss but the dude walked because Judge Swine thought she “welcomed it” with her appearance. For Hopkins vs. Price Waterhouse, Ms. Hopkins was denied a partnership because she wasn’t “feminine enough” and didn’t wear make up.

Page 21: [continued text from page 20]

Rape, insult, degredation…Overwhelmed? Thats exactly what our system wants you to feel. But together, as wimmin and men, we can do away with this conditioning, this abuse. WIMMIN: Protest, riot, fight back, fuck shit up, but NEVER allow yourself to feel guilty for your abuse. Learn to love yourself and your body for who you are and what you can do, as well as who you arent and what you cant do. mEN: I share your gender. I know what sexist pigs we can be, its fucking time to start viewing wimmin as equals, NOT beneath us as some sort of fucktoys. Relinquish your power over wimmin and learn that REAL strength comes from within, not dominance over others! We can overthrow our patriarchal government (as we should!) but ultimately, the change to end this shit will come from ourselves, with our attitudes and your actions. So lets work together to truly end sexism and, in the process, FUCK THE GOVERNMENT HARD! Michael Wood

[image depicting a “punk” drinking a beer]

BREW YOUR OWN BEER, SUPPORT D-I-Y PUNK PROJECTS, GO VEGETARIAN, TAKE THE TIME TO LEARN HOW ANARCHY WORKS

VOMIT BLOOD
po box 65072
St. Paul, mn 55165-0072
2 stamps, or trade w/d-i-y punk zines!

Page 22:

“Women must claim anorexia as political damage done to us by a social order that considers our destruction insignificant because of what we are-less. We should identify it as Jews identify death camps, as homosexuals identify AIDS: as a disgrace that is not our own, but that of an inhumane social order.

“Anorexia is a prison camp. One-fifth of well-educated American young women are inmates. Susie Orbach compared anorexia to the hunger strikes of political prisoners, particularly the suffragists. But the time for metaphors is behind us. To be an anorexic or a bulemic is to be a political prisoner.”

from Naomi Wolf’s Beauty Myth

Well, I did it.

Thank for reading Venus Envy #1. The format and contents of this one was pretty focused. In the future I’d like to open the floor, so to speak, to make my issues into a wide-encompassing ‘zine. There’s too much fucking shit being done to us to be silent.

‘Nuff sed.

I’d also like to take some time to thank some very special people in my life. First of all, to Jeff the subhumyn freak, for lending me the shoulder to cry on while this thingy was taking shape. That’s one anarchist

Page 23: [continuation of text from page 22]

who is 100% PUNK AS FUCK!!! (check out his ‘zine, Harmful Matter, c/o the same p.o. Box as Venus Envy).

Also a big FUCKIN’ THANK YOU goes out to Michael Wood for proving to me that there are still beautiful people somewhere out there with fucking “right-on-it” brains and hearts. You’re a good animal, Michael (p.s., check out his ‘zine Vomit Blood, a p.o. Box 65072, St. Paul MN. 55165…postage 2 stamps or trade with other D-I-Y punk ‘zines…it’s also quite fuckin’ cool!!!)

THere’s not too much info out and about on fat prejudice. In this zine I quoted a bit from The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf. Check that one out, its really angry with a lot of good facts. Also, check out the Youth Green Clearinghouse pamphlet “The Fat Illusion” for 50 cents (p.o. Box 7293, Minneapolis, MD. 55407). If you are involved in some way on trying to dispel this shit prejudice (and we are talking about all prejudices now) and would like to correspond, drop a line to: M@CE, c/o Venus Envy…p.o. box [address crossed out with arrow pointing to new address hand written >] 8948 MPLS, MN 55408. (or if you are as fucking fed up as me and need to talk….)

Lastly, I would like to send out a big green speckled FUCK YOU to parties like VOGUE, GLAMOUR, all those shit magazines, all that shit t.v. advertising, and any of you fuckers that help promote the suffering we humyns are goign thru….cheers!!!!

M@CE (in yer face)

p.s. listen to spitboy and read Too Far ‘zine (remember the poem a few pages ago?) because they fuckin’ rule!!!!!!

[border image depicting a fat person, anarchy symbol, peace symbol, and other symbols]

Page 24:

[triangle around text]

April 25 1993 March on Washington
For Gay, Lesbian, and Bi Equal Rights and Liberation

[remaining text outside of the triangle]

ANARCHIST CONTINGENT

Several member of the love & Rage Network will be attending the march and would like to get together an anarchist contingent (the idea is to make it easier for interested anti-authoritarians to connect, not for L&R to plan an action and recruit participants….this is not intended as a ‘black bloc’). Some people may also want to stay for the Monday civil disobedience actions planned by the march organizers. We are looking for sleeping space in DC (which is already filling up) and requesting a place in the line up near ACT UP/QN and other street activists. The march organizers have a broad processive agenda (anti-racist, favoring national health care and indigenous self determination) which L&R has endorsed. Please come and show your support for sexual liberation!

FOR MORE DETAILS, CONTACT L&R AT 212-925-7966


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